.. to the name of this town in a desktop globe.. Tuesday, May 29 2007 

I can talk again! And I only have one more dose of nasty antibiotics left. Hooray!

For a couple of days there I couldn’t Stand the sound of my own voice.. all nasally and gross. It seems to be pretty much normal now. Still got a bit of a burr in the back of my throat, and I’m a little afraid of what will happen if I swallow just wrong, but other than that I seem to have made a full recovery. Hooray! Again!

Which is good, because I gotta bust it out this week so this show can go up. Trying to pump myself up.. ahh motivation, you villain. We meet again!

Oh, and that lady paid me. Sent the check the day I wrote the email. Fine then. But now I am more certain to pay my rent on time. Ah..

I was very lonely all weekend and wanted nothing so much as to be camping. The weather was beautiful here, which didn’t help. Sad.

I celebrated time-and-a-half day at work instead. Eight hours = twelve hours = cash money for me. Yay! Ought to be helpful, especially since I missed so much work this week.

It is getting warm and humid here. I have a Mighty Need for a window fan. I went toTarget and they were out. I will have to try again. My life is that exciting, everyone.

My skin is super clear because I’m sweating so much. It’s weird. I almost miss my pimples.. am I a freak? Don’t answer that!

Wahh.. I wanna be camping.. I don’t even have any gear exceptsome garb and my air mattress..

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…then she’ll sing down-a-down, hey, down derry…. Thursday, May 24 2007 

Well, an update for my loyal fans.. I appear to be partially back on solid foods. Hooray! I had soft chicken and overcoked pasta for dinner. It ain’t steak, but it’s a start.

I still have to be careful though- too fast with the orange juice and it comes out my nose.

I still have an embarrassing speech impediment. The back of my mouth isn’t moving correctly, so I have a really nasal tone and there are certain consanants I have a great deal of difficulty pronouncing. I sound like I am uh.. challenged. Certain of my coworkers had a great time making Hellen Keller jokes at my expense yesterday.

I did go to work though. I felt just fine other than the speech impededimnth. So I am not as hosed for money as I might have been, I hope.

I am however officially a week behind working on my show. Had me some panic time today. I’m not the only one behind though, and I have a perfectly good excuse, so I’m gonna try not to let it make me feel like a failure. And there’s not much I can do beyond what I’m doing, so uh, yeah. Me keep on trucking.

I sent a terse email to that lady who owes me money. Haven’t heard back yet. We’ll see how it goes.

I’ve decided that unless some awesome painting work falls into my lap, I’m going to spend the weeks after Marisol closes concentrating on the bunny site. It needs some full-time love. And it’ll make me some dough. ‘Tis a project I have let slide far too long! What with the move, and all. I think I may have found my printer. Must get my ducks in a row…

I’ve got some friends gonna come visit me this summer! It’s gonna be awesome. I can’t wait.

Roomate Dan is gone for the weekend again. It’s just me and Iso and Brattycat MoMo. There’ll be some beatin’ goin’ down, I tell ya!

Doctor, doctor, give me the news.. Tuesday, May 22 2007 

An EPIC POST. Haha! Boy, Howdy, what a day. I went to the hospital! Wheee!! It was equal parts terrifying and exciting and incredibly boring, all in one delightful 11 hour thrillride.

I was so Sick yesterday- I’d been fighting this nasty throat infection for a few days, but I was thinking I might be able to knock it down with lots or rest and fluids myself, and avoid an unescessary doctor visit. I get kind of scared in Doctor’s offices. And I am all alone in an unfamiliar place and I don’t have insurance anyway, so why go to all the trouble just to have them tell me to go home and sleep and drink fluids. I figured could do that myself, ask around about where to go if I need to, and see if it gets any worse.

Well, it got worse. Yesterday I could not talk coherantly without incredible pain (which was sort of okay since I was home alone all day). What was not okay was tht I could not swallow. Not even my own spit. It hurt SO BAD. I was a drooly weepy mess of slighty feverish panicky pain.

So I got up bright and early and made my way to the ER this morning. Turns out the big Brooklyn hospital is right in my neighborhood. I took a five minute bus ride and I was there. When I got out I even walked home! It was a beautiful sunny day, you see.

I had by some miracle recovered enough of my voice that I didn’t have to communicate by legal pad or mime after all, which made it easier. I was still so wigged out that my pulse rate was up high enough they gave me and EKG to see if I was having heart complications. I wasn’t, of course. EKG was normal. I figured I must have been more scared than I was letting on.

Well, turned out it was a good thing I went to the big hospital, and not the little neighborhood clinic that might have been cheaper but was farther away. Because I did indeed have a more complicated problem than just the tonsilitis. Turns out I had “Peritonsilar abcess”. *Grossness Alert* Apparantly I had a large mass of gunky pus trapped behind my right tonsil. A really big one too. That was what was making it so painful to swallow! My tonsil was so swollen it was pressing up against every other thing back there. And full of pus! EwwEwwEww!

Well, I guess they don’t see this sort of thing in the ER much. At one point I was in a tiny room with (I kid you not) FIVE doctors, most of whom had no reason to be there other than intellectual curiosity. It was totally even better than doctors on TV. And they all wanted to look in my mouth. “Do you mind if I take a look too, miss? I ve never seen one of these..” There were some war stories- “I saw this once before in Staten Island, but it wasn’t as big”.. Older Doctor mentoring and/or mocking the younger ones.. “Man, they just don’t make residents like they used to”, “Yes, you should definately aspirate here, but I do think a referal to ENT is a good idea anyway”. And one underthebreath and poorly timed sexual innuendo regarding the preparation of the ultrasound machine. They had to put a sterile glove on the wand, see, and cover it with a lubricating goo..

It was hilarious. And really scary. I mean, I’m there in a chair in a dark room and a bright light in my face, with five total strangers peering into my mouth, one of whom is weilding a large needle. It’s the sort of thing I don’t like to see at the movies, because I’m afraid it might give me nightmares. I tried to keep my eyes closed, and there’s something pokey in my mouth, and there are all these people in this tiny room and I’m drooling like a drugged up puppy and there’s my blood on all those tools and down my chin and onmychest and in thesuctiontube ohmygodohgodohgod..

But I must have bottled it up pretty good, because they were all like “you’re the most cooperative patient ever! I guess I only made small whimpering noises, and there was one brief moment of “stop, I need to take a few deep breaths before I start to panic, please”. Mostly I was quiet, or giggling at them. Seriously, Scrubs ain’t got nothing on the Kings County ER team. They were awesome.

But after they all left and it was quiet again, I started bawling. Straight up gulpy sobbing into one of those crunchy paper towels they have. It’s a lot for a girl to take in in an afternoon. I mean I was lonely and scared and I’d felt bad all week, but it was starting to get better but there were still some scary things to do.. And it felt so very good to cry. So good.

I was almost finished when one of the doctors came in to get something he’d forgotten. “Did we hurt you?” says he, all serious. “Do you need more pain medication?!”

“No no,” says I. “I just needed to have a cry. It happens sometimes.”

“Okay”, he said. He must have been satisfied with this because I never saw him again. He was one of the doctors who was just along for the ride.

Well, they did pierce the abcess, but for all the excitement they couln’t get it out in the ER, so they sent me upstairs to the Ear Nose and Throat people. I managed to get there before their 4:30 closing time. I think I may have been the last patient they saw before they went home.. The doctor there took ten minutes and an intimidating array of tools (one of which looked suspicously like a tiny exacto knife), and slice scrape suction that bad boy was out. She didn’t even need to see the ultrasound. Wow for specialization.

I think my next life I might want to be a doctor. Last year I wanted to be a lawyer in my next life. Learning things is cool.

I’ll just have to keep collecting extra lives. Is ther a bonus round I can play for that or something? Some sort of secret easter egg in the programming? Even an, ahem, cheat code or two perhaps..

After that I got sent back down for an hour of “observation”, to make sure I didn’t leave before they were sure that I had some fluids in me and that my blood was clotting correctly. And then at last they sent me home.
Hospitals are also very boring. I’d even come prepared, I had a book! And a drawing pad, even.
I finished the book. I spent a lot of hours sitting alone in a room waiting for a doctor, or waiting for an IV to finish so they could take it out. I got pretty good at my cell phone bowling game though. I’m still just as bad at it as I am real bowling, but on the phone I have at least figured out the controls.

Of course, that last hour I was most sick of being in a hospital. I had not only finished my book, but I was bored with phone games and they had an IV in my right arm so I couldn’t draw, and I got absolutely zero reception, so I couldn’t even send out sad text messages or call my mom. Urrgh. So bored..

And HUNGRY. I hadn’t been able to eat in like, 40+ hours. Even soft liquidy foods were impossible for most of my Sunday. I’d had chicken soup on Saturday and that was it. Gatorade does not a meal make. So the prospect of going home and Eating was making me just squirm. Even if my diet is still limited to broth and smoothies. I don’t care. It all tastes good.

I made more chicken soup tonight, this time from scratch (ish), with milk in it for the creamy. And raspberry jello juice! I’m still waitng for it to set. Oh, it was so good! I did discover I am not yet ready for noodles. Or bananas. The back of my mouth is still too tender for that. May be tomorrow or wednesday Also if I swallow too fast some of whatever it is will come out my nose. I hope this just becasue my throat is still numb and not because something got permenantly moved back there. But now I get to go buy things like Ice cream and popsicles and soothing hard candies because I am the sickie! And I have a couple of days off work too. Goody goody!

It was funny, I had actually been scehduled to work today. I got the call from my boss when I was waitng at the ENT clinic. “Anne-Marie, we were expecting you today..”

“Well,” says I, (and mind you that between the infection and the numbing drugs I sound like a muppet being smothered in the other room) “I’m in the hospital”. Can anyone come up with a better reason not to be at work? I think not! So I got out of my shift tomorrow and I’m not scheduled again until Thursday. And to be sure I will be working all this weekend, becasue after that I have to take two weeks off to work on my Marisol show I feel so behind in, and I need the good wishes. And the money. Damned antibiotics cost me over a hundred dollars, and I don’t even know what the ER bill’s gonna look like. Although I’m not entirely sure I’m getting one.. The only Money guy I talked to was at the ENT clinic, and there all I had to do was tell them how poor I was, and all they made me do was throw down a 20$ copay. I’m not sure if that is a separate thing or not. We’ll find out when they start sending me letters, I guess.

So a bit of an epic day in Annie-town. I have sucessfully been to the hospital. And more importantly, returned from there a much happier, healthier specimen. Hooray!

…and flagged the train… Friday, May 18 2007 

oh Hai guyz I am sick!

I was going to hold out posting until someone commented, but I could hold out no longer. Sick sick sick.. Mah tonsils are all swolled up! I called out of work today. I might have to go to the doctor. I can’t afford to be sick! This sucks.

I thought I would be fine until yesterday when I went to work and felt progressively worse and worse as the day went on.. and last night I think I was running a temp but there’s no way to really tell.

I can’t hardly swallow anything unless it is liquidy or cold. Although my roomate made french toast this morning and it was soft enough that I got a piece down. I’m really hungry and I can’t hardly swallow anything. WAHHH! It makes me very cranky.

I’ve been glueing sequins onto angel wings all week. They’re nearly done and they look awesome. Now I have to get better so that I can do more shopping.

I also made a pregnancy suit- complete with a fat little pillowbaby. I think it will work good. I watched a bit of rehearsal and was suitably (haha!) impressed.

I had to take the last week of may and the frst week of june off Bodies work so that I will have time to work on this show, as I am feeling behind. And if I have to take all this weekend off for sick.. aah I will be very poor. And that lady from that terrible assistant job has yet to pay me. I am cranky enough I just might send her that nasty email I’ve been putting off for a week now. Why can’t people keep their promises? I kind of hate the world right now. Poop.

..call the men of science, and let them hear this song… Sunday, May 13 2007 

Well, the exciting news of today is that I have upgraded my email account so that I won’t have to plow through all my old emails and empty out the trash so much. It’s sort of the equivalent of buying better cat litter. Which I do need, incidently..

I had a friend from Seattle come and visit me this week. She totally ate up all of my days off. We had an awesome time doing girly things like getting pedicures and gossiping and going to a Yankee game. It was cap day. Now I own both a Yankees and a Mets cap, and I don’t even follow baseball. I guess they may end up in a show at some point.

I feel behind in my work but there’s not much I can do about it until Tuesday, except to keep gluing sequins on this set of angel wings. It is very boring and I have to do two of them, for a total of eight sides. I have half of one side done. I may need to think up a more time-efficient plan. Tuesday I go in to take measurements. Yay!  Two weeks later than I wanted them, but that’s the way the schedule worked. I do have some of the shoe sizes though, I suppose I could look for shoes on Monday.

No matter what I gotta make some lists tomorrow. Then I will know just how far behind I am.

Roomate Dan is visiting his family this weekend so I have the house to myself. It is very quiet, except for his cat. MoMo is noisy and wants to be fed all the time. Also he goes into my room and tries to beat up Iso. But now she has taken to hiding under the bed, and he’s too fat to get at her.  She did come out of my room of her own volition the other day! That was very exciting, but it was while my friend Dante was over and I haven’t seen it happen since. Maybe I just need to have guests more often, or something.

It is Beautiful and Sunny here! And the flowers are all a-bloomin, and it’s warm.. It got pretty toasty and humid the other day too. My hair loves it.

I have to buy a fan for my room, because I will be mighty warm come summertime, methinks.

Slowly I amass more furniture.. I have a mighty need for bookshelves. Also some sort of clean laundry storage system.

Laundry! I hates it.

So my dayjob may be very boring, but the people who work there are great. We had a staff meeting this week, and pizza was served. Also I may have made an ass of myself by pointing out that the concept of sexual harassment is indeed very funny, that is until it happens to you. And that it’s really very simple, the key being that if someone seems uncomfortable with something, that’s the cue to Stop, and if you don’t, that’s when you’ve created a problem..

Afterward about a half dozen people came up to me and asked who was bothering me, with the strong implication that whoever it was, they were in for an ass-whopping. Which made me feel pretty good, but I had to explain that no, nobody was harassing me at this job, but that I have had it happen at previous places of work. I have since learned to take care of myself and others by being noisy about it.

Not a socially inept nineteen year old anymore, and boy is that good. Now I’m a slightly less inept 22-year old, but we all gotta work with what we’re given..